Retirement humor
Business Jargon for Retirement
Manage your paradigm shift
Popular business jargon takes on different meanings once you make the paradigm shift into retirement.
The $64,000 question
Should we buy that camper van or put the money into a college fund for our grandchildren?
Where the rubber meets the road
Road trip. That question wasn’t so hard.
Manage the optics
We need reading glasses, distance glasses, interacting glasses, and computer glasses. Managing optics is essential to getting the most out of retirement.
We need to monetize this
We need to exchange dollars for the local currency.
I’m an agent of change
Here’s some for the parking meter.
Don’t leave money on the table
There’s no tipping in New Zealand.
Who’s going to step up to the plate?
Let’s get this buffet line moving already.
It was the perfect storm
It came in overnight, dumped a foot of fresh powder, and the sun is out for skiing today.
Take a 30,000 foot view
Everything looks better from the window of an airplane on the way to Barbados. Sit back and have another sip of champagne.
We need boots on the ground
The activity coordinator is attempting to organize a hike.
We’re facing some headwinds
Tack, for Christ’s sake. Haven’t you ever skippered a sunfish before?
Move the needle
Try getting a blood sample from my other arm this time. You’re making me look like a drug addict.
It’s gone viral
There’s a shot for that.
Best practices
Doctors who accept Medicare.
What’s the deliverable
And do we need to sign for it?
Too many chefs in the kitchen
Honey, could you please show our guests to the gazebo? I need room to cook.
Get Rick Post’s stories in your inbox
Join Medium for free to get updates from this writer.
Open door policy
In or out? This damn dog can’t make up its mind.
It’s scalable
I’d still recommend using the climbing ropes.
It’s best of breed
I’d still recommend the chicken piccata.
What’s the value added?
Important to know when computing VAT taxes when leaving the EU.
Market strategy
Avoid going to the market on the weekends, it’s way too crowded.
Be a team player
A pickleball game is about to start.
Game changer
The guy on the other team won the pickleball tournament last year.
Net/bottom line
Another pickleball reference. You need to stay behind the line. If you get too close to the net, you’re inside the box, and it’s a penalty to play a ball from there. Think outside the box.
Let’s put our game faces on
Pickleball tourney.
He Dropped the ball
There will be a slight delay while Steve bends over to retrieve the pickleball.
Loop me in
I’m next in line for the zip line.
Comparing apples to oranges
Honey, what goes in a sangria?
Phoned it in
Our to-go order should be ready in thirty minutes.
Business operations
Many businesses aren’t open on the weekends, so you must continue to keep track of the day of the week. Bars are open every day. Pay attention to happy hour times and look for senior discounts.
International business
When vacationing in France, be flexible. You’re likely to be stranded somewhere for a few days due to a train strike. The French go on strike a lot.
Let’s talk about the elephant in the room
This safari sucks.
Thrown under the bus
I should have tipped the porter.
Low-hanging fruit
Honey, could you pick a lime for my cuba libre?
Manage expectations
I’m retired. What did you expect?
